There are three things in this world that nobody has hard evidence for: God, why Ryan Seacrest is a star, and the logic used for pay raises. The first I will take on faith, and the second I will accept as the burden I pay for the gift of free will. But the third? Well, I accept it as well because who complains when getting a raise?
Why is President Czar so angry at “Churchies?” We’ll probably get letters about that one.
↓ Transcript
CZAR: I've been informed that we need to set wage increases for the new fiscal year. We have staff, faculty, and administration. Any suggestions?
BROCCOLI: Should we consult cost of living increases?
CZAR: That seems like more effort than I'm aware of any person being able to make.
BROCCOLI: Alright then, how about 1% for staff, 3% for faculty, and 39% for administration?
CZAR: Whoa, whoa, whoa! 1%? What are we, churchies at Easter?
BROCCOLI: Should we consult cost of living increases?
CZAR: That seems like more effort than I'm aware of any person being able to make.
BROCCOLI: Alright then, how about 1% for staff, 3% for faculty, and 39% for administration?
CZAR: Whoa, whoa, whoa! 1%? What are we, churchies at Easter?
